Hello lovely humans,
I cannot believe that June is already here and the year is halfway over! *gasp*
It’s been forever since I have sat down and written a recap of my month.
But to be honest, since my last one in October, you only missed a few life events and a lot of school. I can’t stress how much school has happened. *shivers*
But here we are at the start of summer looking back into May.
May is such a lovely month.
I always forget to document actual events I go to or actual interesting things that happen, because I typically put the camera down and just enjoy the moment as much as I can.
So my monthly recaps are mostly reflections of thoughts and remembering moments, accompanied by my little itty bitty bit of “photography”.
1. Mother’s Day
I can’t make a May recap without mentioning Mother’s Day.
Taking time to reflect on all my mom has done for our family and how often she’s been there for me has left me in awe of mother’s everywhere.
The dedication and unconditional love they have is the most incredible strength I have ever witnessed.
REAL TALK: I don’t think I have ever fully appreciated my mom, and I don’t think I will truly be able to until I am a mom someday, but as I get older, the more I am appreciating and am amazed by all she does.
Also, this mother’s day, someone started praying for the mothers and they also prayed over the future moms. I realized they were referring to me and my peers, and the craziest moment of appreciation to God for making me woman swept over me.
It’s an amazing gift to be a woman, and in a world that is continually trying to redefine what that means, I am thankful that I don’t have to worry about who I am or what my purpose is, because I know that God has made me and is guiding me to be the woman He needs me to be. I pray that it’ll lead me to being a wife and mother someday– because that’s what I believe God has placed as a desire in my heart for a reason — and I am so excited for my future and all God has in store for it. And I am only hopeful of my future because I know my identity is in God, created by God, and designed for a beautiful purpose.
2. f l o w e r s
One rainy day in May my family decided to go to a garden center to buy plants for our garden.
As my mom made decisions on what plants would look best in our yard, I got lost in the garden lit with parking lot lights. The cold air was filled with droplets of rain and the flowers looked so lovely. As long as I didn’t look up and see the parked cars 15 feet from me, I could easily imagine myself anywhere else than where I was.
I don’t think most people would think rainy days are ideal for gardening, but my family isn’t like most people.
I think in that moment I kind of figured out the whole, “stop and smell the roses” thing.
It’s about making the most of life– look for the good.
Slow down, enjoy the moment.
Be the one to find the ordinary beautiful.
Be the one that’s walking through garden center taking photos as though she were lost in a secret garden.
Most people would have avoided being out in the rain, but we obviously laughed at it.
It’s the little things in life. It really, truly is.
3. confidence & fashion
I’ve been wanting to write blog posts on fashion for a while but have always hesitated.
Last month I finally made myself do it. (And you can read it here.)
It took a lot to make that post. I’ve always been insecure about how others perceive me.
Fashion is the first thing people see about you, outfits are like a book’s cover sometimes.
My style changes so often that I don’t think any can truly read me based off my cover.
Being 5’11” has made me stand out more than I want to. And especially if I am trying something new outfit wise, if it doesn’t work, people see it and know it.
I am so happy I made myself finally talk about something I like, and find a new form of confidence in doing so. Face your fears, chances are they’ll become your favorite thing.
4. la fin // the end
For those of you who don’t know me, I have taken voice lessons for the past 4 years of high school. It’s been the most unexpected and most influential experience of my life. And I had my final recital in May.
Music has been such a major part of my life.
Singing has lead to my greatest accomplishments thus far, it’s brought me the most opportunities and experiences, and through it, God helped me gain a new confidence in my abilities.
I know that I wouldn’t be who I am if it weren’t for music teaching me diligence and patience. There’s no greater dedication than pushing yourself to be a better version of who you are. Whether that’s in music, sports, academics, or work.
To continually balance pushing yourself and being patient with yourself is one of the greatest things music has taught me.
Music allowed me to step out my comfort zone, I auditioned for The Voice twice, I won a scholarship, I lead worship, and so many other things I never would have done otherwise.
I never really loved music until age 15, and now I do not feel that it’s something to be pursued. I think it was in my life just long enough to help me grow as a person, and now I am to take those skills and apply them to new things in life.
At the time music was all I had until God brought me where I am.
With the new skill set in confidence, I feel as though I can do all God has in store for me, because I know I am capable of all God places in my life.
so with one final bow, I am ready for the next stage in life. The next comfort zone to exit from, and the new adventure to pursue.
La fin; the end.